An entirely fictional smuggler’s packing checklist has been rejected by an imaginary common-sense tribunal after listing three hundred tortoises and seventy-seven parrots under ‘a few things for the journey’.
The tribunal noted that most travellers struggle to fit two suitcases into a car without a disagreement. Attempting to include a substantial mobile ecosystem suggested that the usual holiday debate about leaving things at home had not taken place.
In this invented proceeding, the defence argued that the animals were personal items. The tribunal asked which particular personal need required seventy-seven parrots. Conversation was proposed, then withdrawn on the grounds that one parrot would already provide a challenging amount.
Three hundred tortoises were harder to explain. They could not reasonably be described as a quick getaway, and their collective luggage allowance remained unclear. The fictional defence’s suggestion that they were all emotional-support animals failed when nobody could identify whose emotions had benefited.
The tribunal directed its criticism at the imagined trafficker, observing that animals do not become travel accessories merely because someone has managed to put them beside a spare tyre. Proper care was recommended over further improvisation.
A revised packing list was submitted containing a toothbrush, clean clothes and a passport. For the first time, officials believed the passenger might have understood the concept of going somewhere without taking an entire habitat.
